4 Signs You’re Touch Starved, Not NEEDY
Do you often feel a strong longing for physical affection?
If so, you might be experiencing touch starvation.
Also known as “skin hunger,” this is a real phenomenon that
can affect anyone, as described by psychologists like Matthew Hertenstein.
Spotting the symptoms can help you understand
that you’re not just being needy.
By becoming more aware of these signs,
you can take the necessary steps to address your need for touch,
improve your overall well-being, and nurture healthier relationships.
1. Increased Feelings of Loneliness and Isolation
Are you constantly feeling lonely and disconnected from others,
even when you’re surrounded by friends and family?
It can be a puzzling and unsettling feeling,
leaving you questioning why you feel this way despite being
in the presence of people who genuinely care about you.
This could be an indication that you’re experiencing touch starvation.
Psychologist Tiffany Field from the Touch Research Institute
has discovered that human touch is an incredibly powerful way
to create connections and build a sense of belonging.
The absence of physical affection, such as hugs or gentle touches,
can intensify feelings of isolation and make it difficult
to feel emotionally connected to those around you.
2. Heightened Sensitivity to Touch
Do you react intensely to casual physical contact,
such as a hug or a pat on the back?
Picture yourself at a social gathering,
observing friends and acquaintances casually engaging
in friendly touches like hugs and gentle pats.
If you find yourself experiencing a sudden surge of emotions
or an overwhelming desire to be included in these interactions,
you may be touch starved.
When you’re touch-starved, it’s not uncommon for your body
to become more sensitive to even the slightest physical contact.
Dr. Kory Floyd, a communication professor
who researches affection, explains that this heightened sensitivity
can manifest as a longing for touch or an intense reaction
to casual contact—like when someone holds your hand
or wraps their arms around your shoulder to make you feel
you’re not alone.
3. Emotional Imbalance and Mood Swings
Physical touch releases oxytocin, a hormone that promotes
bonding and reduces stress.
When you’re going through a rough day, feeling stressed,
and longing for comfort but not having the physical connection
you need to soothe your emotions,
it can be disheartening and overwhelming.
Touch starvation can take a toll on your emotional well-being,
sometimes leading to mood swings, irritability,
and even increased anxiety or depression.
Helen Fisher, an anthropologist and relationship expert,
explains that when we lack touch, our oxytocin levels might decrease,
which can throw our emotional balance off.
4. Craving Non-Intimate Touch
Have you been yearning for non-intimate forms of touch lately?
When you notice a group of friends laughing, playing,
and nudging each other, you might find yourself craving to be a part
of this interaction—not just for the camaraderie,
but also for the comforting non-intimate touch that comes with it.
Perhaps you’ve noticed that you’ve been hugging your friends
more often or have a sudden urge to schedule a massage.
This might be a sign that you’re touch-starved
and craving physical connection. Dr. Daniel Goleman,
a psychologist and author,
explains that humans are wired to seek touch as
a fundamental way of communicating empathy
and creating connections.
When you’re touch-starved, your body might try to compensate
by seeking non-sexual touch experiences.
How to Address It
Remember, you’re not alone in craving touch; it’s a natural human need.
To experience touch in a supportive environment, you can:
- Reach out to your loved ones for more physical connection.
- Consider activities like dance classes.
- Schedule a massage.
By taking these steps, you’ll improve your well-being,
strengthen bonds, and create new connections.
Addressing touch starvation can bring positive change to your life.
